Complaining

How often do you find yourself complaining about something? I think most of us are unaware of how often we complain.

Challenge to stop complaining

I came across a book titled “A Complaint Free World” by Will Bowen published back in 2007. Since it only had 176 pages, I decided to read it. The book challenges its readers to try and go 21 days without complaining, criticizing or gossiping. The author gave out free purple silicone bracelets to help people track when they did any of these. If you catch yourself complaining, criticizing or gossiping, you move the bracelet to the other wrist and start over, from the beginning. Although this is a 21 day challenge, the author warned not to be surprised if it took seven or more months to achieve.

Accepting the challenge

I decided to take the challenge. Instead of wearing a silicone bracelet, I would use a thin gold band I wear on my left thumb. I figured I would move it to the opposite thumb whenever I caught myself verbally complaining, criticizing or gossiping. Did you notice I said “verbally”? The challenge allows us to have negative thoughts. We are human and negative thoughts are going to happen. But being human, we have control of what comes out of our mouths. When we allow negative thoughts (ie: complaints, criticism or gossip) to be expressed verbally, we give power to the negativity surrounding the words. We invite negativity into our lives.

Complaint-free life

We complain about what is wrong in our life, with others, with ourselves. Instead of focusing on what we want in our lives, we focus on what we do not have. We make excuses. As the author states: “When we control our words by eradicating complaining, we create our lives with intention and attract what we desire.”

I want to live with intention and attract what I desire, don’t you?

I always thought of myself to be a positive person. Negative people bring me down. The last thing I want to do is do that to someone else. But day one of the challenge, I saw how often complaints came out of my mouth because I was either frustrated, looking for empathy, or just simply venting. It surprised me how often negative words left my mouth. I have been doing this challenge for a week.

How many successful days have I not complained? One. Even though I have gone only one day, the complaints that leave my mouth have diminished substantially. Not only that, my thoughts are changing. More aware, I am learning not to sweat the small stuff. I am learning to reframe my thoughts.

Your choice

We have no control over circumstances that challenge us and compel us to complain. That will not change. We do have control over how we react to those circumstances. How we use our words is our choice.

What life do you choose to create? Living a life of gratitude? Or living a life of complaint?

Prayer

Heavenly Father, Your Word says “a soothing tongue is a tree of life, but a perverse tongue crushes the spirit”. Empower us to only speak words of life. Open our eyes to see the blessings all around us. Give us a grateful spirit. We rejoice always, pray continually, and give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for us in Christ Jesus.

Proverbs 15:4, 1 Thessalonians 5:15-18